So maybe I am silly, unrealistic, immature, etc...

"The main thing that keeps popping into my head is to sit with yourself with no distractions and really ask yourself what it is you would love to be doing if money was no barrier. What is your dream? It doesn’t have to be some big elaborate thing. Then, write it down exactly as you want it to be. Write it like it is already here, already happening. Read it once a day, and then lay it in a place that nobody else disturbs. I put mine on an altar where I meditate. I did this, and within 2 months I had exactly what I wrote. So, don’t try to figure out how you will get it, just “put it out there” and let it be. But, keep your ears and eyes open for opportunities. Don’t ignore anything, even if it doesn’t look like an opportunity. Keep listening to your heart, and ignoring what people are telling you you “should” do. Maybe you will have to take a job until something else works out, but maybe not. I wouldn’t worry about the student loans right now. Tell yourself that all is working exactly as it should be. (assuming you aren’t ignoring things that really need to be done).

I believe the reason you are feeling down is because you don’t want to be in the workplace doing something that doesn’t feed you. Keep thinking outside the box. It doesn’t have to look like an ordinary situation.
Hope this helps a bit. Let me know if you want to talk more or brainstorm.

Much love to you,

Amie J"

What's above is what a new friend wrote to me after I emailed her on her 'Overcoming Depression' website. Below is my reply.

I printed out what you wrote and I am going to begin brainstorming to try to come up with what I "really want to do". The only thing that keeps popping into my head is FREEDOM! I want to write for money, I want to cook, bake, clean, be with my kids, and create pastry art for money... I want a variety of ways for money to come to me through doing things that I enjoy. Society tells me that such a "Jill of all Trades" isn't a job, and won't bring in enough income... I want society to be wrong... but am I being unrealistic? I have a few weeks to find out.

Still Dreaming.....