Middle of the night/early morning revelations

I have begun waking up some nights at around 5:21am. Really, really early for my biological body clock that usually loves staying up past midnight and sleeping in past 10am. I went to sleep at around 1:30am, yet still woke up at 5:30 or 6am, not sure exactly when, because I tried to go back to sleep. I listened to both of my pagan CD's, each about 45 minutes each, and they sounded lovely. But my mind just wouldn't slow down. Could'be been due to the fact that I was woken up 3 times by my beautiful children wanting to come sleep with me.
My sweet Nathan woke up in his room, and I could here him getting out of bed saying, "I want to see my Mooommmy!" then again as he came down the hallway...
Jaidyn was afraid of pumpkin headed monsters, after she was awoken by her sister turning sideways and kneeing her off their sleeping pad on our bedroom floor. So she ended up in our bed. James has compromised with the kids that on Saturday nights they can sleep on our floor. And I will lay with them until they go to sleep in their rooms on other nights if they need me.
But I digress. I was thinking up all sorts of wonderful ideas about getting a food processor to grind finer wheat flour for healthier food, new board games that we can play as a family. Savannah liked our family night last night so much that she suggested we do it weekly.
spiderwebs at marc's for .89 for the halloween party, aromatherapy for Travis and I in addition to the vitamin d, finding an adventure book to read to the kids once or twice a week, and epic one that seems to go on forever to hold their interest.
buying a box with dividers to hold the clay and keep the colors seperated and the clay workable.
working on Travis' keyblade with him, watching youtube with the kids and getting ideas for things they may want to pursue
actually starting my discussions at the Doylestown library that I've been wanting to, such as the childbirth/pregnancy one, and the respectful parents, respectful kids one....or even the female reproductive health discussion. anything to boost my confidence in myself, and help me ward off these, poor me, I have no life if my kids dont' need me every second of the day, and me only feelings.
making decorations for the Halloween party, and being sure to plan ahead, not wait for the last minute to do everything...
talking to Gina about non-money ways that CORA could pay me such as discounts they may have a any stores, etc...
saying a family motto/saying before dinner while holding hands to raise family solidarity, like they do in the army...especially to create more of a James/Michelle family solidarity, not just the extended Schooling family... Oh my god. that's exactly what my MIL has been doing by having all these events at her house..building the Extended Schooling family solidarity. Thats why my kids complain so much when I say that the grandparents/cousins are ONLY extended family, not immediate family.. they have more solidarity in their minds for the extended than they do for their own immediate family. Sandi has created that, and James/I haven't made our immediate family solidarity as visible.... the kids are welcome to have both, but I do want them to have both.
I thought about music and its influence in the house, and how making music was the only way people used to be able to have it in their homes...It led me to thinking about asking the high school for discounts or freebies on musical instruments they have/no longer use...bells, xylophones, etc...
ok, I'm going to go walk Chloe now... I need some physical excercise.... :)

The Process is sooo frustrating!!

I am currently trying to please dh's wants for Travis' education... we have tried unschooling which Travis loves, and dh doesn't. We have tried Video Schooling thru Bob Jones. I hated it, so did Travis. It was curriculum. It would have satisfied dh.
Currently we have tried BOSS schooling.... Missouri curriculum. My thoughts were to minimize the amount of bookwork required to complete the grade. Travis would be compromising, dh would be mostly satisfied....
Now T. doesn't want to do the bookwork... he thinks that he just can't do it.. I think anxiety is playing a role here, and he just feels incapable... I don't know what to do. I left a message with his teacher asking if we could switch to all online classes where a teacher would teach him, and he wouldn't be able to push it off so easily because of the anxiety.... we may try it and see how it goes... he wants to. But I just wonder if all these things we are trying are just going to lead us to find out that unschooling is the best path for him... we are probably going to go the long way for dh's sake mostly and prove that Travis knows what he needs....
I'm frustrated mostly because I feel like I am the one doing all this work of preparing, calling the school, driving, trying to get him to do schoolwork, etc... all for dh.
I guess I could look at it as a way that I am meeting dh's needs..... helping him sort through what works for our family and what doesn't.....
If it were just me, I would just do what Travis feels. It's his life. He is his own person with his own unique capabilities and limitations....
I would be a little nervous, but would follow my gut, right or wrong.....